黄西英语脱口秀台词

时间:2014-06-13 来源:谜语大全|脑筋急转弯 作者:经典对白 点击:
 
  黄西英语脱口秀台词   喜欢看脱口秀节目的朋友应该知道黄西吧,他是脱口秀节目中的著名的人,是一位同时具有生化博士的科学家身份的美籍华裔笑星。。此文是由泡谜语小编为大家整理的黄西英语脱口秀台词,欢迎大家参考。
黄西英语脱口秀台词
 
 
 黄西脱口秀:
  
    黄西(Joe Wong),曾在中国科学院攻读硕士,后获得德克萨斯州莱斯大学博士学位,全职工作从事科学研究。美国深夜节目收视率冠军的“大卫·莱特曼秀”。
 
2009年4月12日晚上破天荒邀请中国口音极重的黄西(Joe Wong)亮相,以英语讲美式笑话,近六分钟的演出,观众反应热烈。黄西一炮而红。
 
 
 
  黄西英语脱口秀台词:
 
       Hi, everybody. Hi! So I don't have too much time up here, before my green card expires. See I grew up in a poor neighborhood in China. The middle school that I went to one year decided to pave the dirt roads with bricks and cement. And the students were required to bring bricks to school and ...We worked really hard for 3 weeks and finally we built a road. Years later, I heard about the term: child labor. I was like, what?! Those kids got paid?!
嗨,大家好啊!嗨!那个……我能表演的时间不多,因为我绿卡马上要过期了。我是在中国的穷乡僻壤长大的。我们初中某年突然决定要修整土路,铺上砖头和水泥,让学生们带砖头到学校来……我们玩命地干了三个礼拜终于把路修好了。多年以后我听说了这个词:童工。我立马就惊讶了,啥?!那些小孩干活还有钱拿?
 
 
I got a D minus. But I read that younger kids nowadays can't even read the analog watches any more. They can only read the digital ones. I was like, how are they gonna report the locations of hot chicks in the future? It's gonna be like, Hot chick, 3 o'clock. I can't stay that long. 
我拿到的只是D-。我看报道,如今的小孩都不会看手表了。他们只能看懂电子表。我心想,等他们长大以后该如何报告辣妹的位置啊?别人说,“辣妹在三点钟方向”。我不能待那么久的。
 
 
So I came to the US for college and I was really into science, which really helped me in the romance department. Like once I asked this girl out and she said, no. I said, are you sure? And she said to me, hey Joe, NO means NO. I said, well... it also means Nitric Oxide. 
我来美国是读大学,我很喜欢科学,这对我的感情生活也大有裨益。有一次,我来美国是读大学,我很喜欢科学,这对我的感情生活也大有裨益。有一次,我约女孩子出去,她说不行。我问,真不行啊?她说,嘿,Joe,NO就是不行的意思。我说,NO也是一氧化氮啊。
 
 
And one year, I went to New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Here's something you guys should know about me. I don't approve of nudity in public. But when it happens, I want to be there. 
有一年,我去新奥尔良参加狂欢节。 对于我,你们要了解一点,我是不赞同公共场合赤身裸体的。不过要是真有人这么干了,那我不能错过啊。
 
 
And when I first came to the United States, I took a English as a second language class. And the teacher there was too lazy to remember the students' names. So he just handed out a list of American names for us to choose from. And by the time I got the list, there were only two names left, so I just picked Joe instead of Jake. And the other day, I told that story to my son, Jake. 
我初到美国时,参加了英语培训课程。我们老师特别懒,记不住学生名字。于是他就给了我们一张美国名字表,让我们选名字。等我拿到表时,只剩下俩名字了,所以我就选了Joe。我选了Joe,另一个是Jake。有一天,我把这故事讲给我儿子听,他叫Jake。
 
So my son is four years old now. But he still has a lot of growing-up to do. Sometimes I look at my son, I was like, wow, this gentleman contributes nothing to society. And I have to pretend that I'm impressed by everything he does. I was like, wow, you walked half a block by yourself? That's amazing! But in the back of my mind, I was like, big deal! When I was a kid, I built a road! 
我儿子现在四岁,不过,他还远远不够成熟。有时,我看着儿子心想,哇哦,这小伙子对社会一点贡献都没有。但我还得装作他所作的事都很了不起。我说,哇哦,你自己走了半个街区?太棒了!其实我心想,这算啥啊!老子小时候修了条路!
 
 
 
 
 
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